I'M SUPPOSED TO PUT WHAT? WHERE?

There's me, and there's my two sisters.  Then came Bethany.  Then my two nieces, Grace and Mags.  A whole bunch of girls.  Grant was the first boy in the family.  Then came Mac and Reid.  I didn't know the first thing about boys but having three in less than three years will make you learn real quick.  It's still a work in progress, though, and it's nights like last night that I realize there's still so much more to learn.  As I was changing Reid's diaper I noticed what looked like either a very large bite or a small knot on the "jewels" if you know what I mean.  Chris was outside grilling some steaks, talking it up on the Crackberry (he and his Blackberry are the reason that term even exists, I'm sure of it), pacing back and forth as he's talking, and that usually means BUSINESS.  Chris pacing = we give him space.  This trumped the pacing.  All I had to say was, "Honey, Reid has some kind of bite or something on his, well... you know,"  and that was all it took.  If I had known that was what had to be said to get him to get off work I would have tried it a lot sooner.  Kidding.  Ok not really but when you're self-employed you really don't ever get off work completely.  Anyhoo, he was off the phone and inside in a flash.  I mean, come on, it's one of his son's and it's THAT.  He takes one look and says, "Oh, that's red bugs.  Just put some clear fingernail polish on it."  HUH?  Chris is a jokester so I was sure this was one of those times.  Only he seemed a little too serious.  Really?  Clear fingernail polish?  Yes, C responded, CLEAR FINGERNAIL POLISH.  I don't do much in the way of manicures but I was sure I had some clear polish somewhere.  I couldn't find it anywhere.  I yell from the kitchen, HONEY, WILL PEARL WORK?  CLEAR, he says.  I still have yet to figure out just why it had to be clear, but I was finally able to find it.  This whole time Reid is laying there ever-so-sweetly and patiently, just waiting.  I was beginning to wonder if this red bug had affected him neurologically.  HA!  I put a diaper underneath him, open the polish, and look at C as if to say, what now?  C says, "Just paint it on there."  I must have asked C 15 times if he was really serious about this.  Seeing that he was becoming annoyed with my unfamiliarity, and realizing men don't really joke when it comes to issues such as this, I realized he was serious.  So paint I did.  Reid found it all quite entertaining (and it didn't burn although I was sure it would).  And though I've read some say the whole fingernail polish thing is a myth, today it's already almost gone. What will I learn next?